Two nights ago, G. and I finally took out some hours from our busy and lazy and mundane lives (yeah, I know it’s weird) and hung out. By ‘hung out’ I mean we biked, did grocery, sat for more than an hour in Tim Hortons (I call it Pimp Hortons) and talked. We used to hang out a lot—about 3 to 5 times a week. But then in last September, I had to move to Toronto for four months and then from January onwards, we both got busy in our studies and..... So it was after 8 months that I was having a good time with G.
While we were biking, she took her cell phone out quite a few times. And that was not-so-G.-like. I had a pretty good idea who she must be texting with and her mood changed afterwards. She looked worried. I hoped against hopes that it was not what I initially thought it was. And then I started talking about random things like movies, Jehovah’s witnesses, weather ... just to take her mind off from whatever was bothering her. It was a pleasant night.
Long story short, I asked G. what the problem was when we were having snacks at Tim. She was shy at first but then she told that M. wanted to talk to her but she told him she was out with me and that M. apparently did not like it much. Just what I thought!
It’s been not very smooth between M and me from the start. It particularly grew rough on G.’s birthday. Haha. I was actually happy that I showed up at G.’s when Mohtarram M. was helping her cook something. And I got happier when M. asked G. to show the presents I brought for her and G. wore the shawl and was struggling to put on the earrings and M. stepped closer to G. and offered help which was rejected immediately. (Dil hi dil main I was like ‘in your face’ :p) And later that night M. asked me very personal questions again on Facebook. Do you love G.?Why did you bring earrings for her? I mean it’s usually not just-friendly, you know? etc etc.. And I was again pi**** off. Again! Tera kia kaam hai Maamay!!! Jumma Jumma aath din hoay nahi aaye hoay, awain free ho raha hai. (G. met M. about 6 months after she and I became friends.)Meri seheli hai. Jo merzi, jab merzi doun! In the end M. surprised me by telling me that M and G. are in a relationship (Nawa aaya’en te chaa gaya aa’en thaa ker ke! )and that he was just making sure that by the end of the day, I don’t get hurt. I was really surprised. I knew from day one when I met him in Toronto that he was eyeing on G. but I didn’t know that... So I apologized to him the next day for being rude and made him very clear that G. and I are just very good friends and he need not worry. I thought it was all good now and we were cool with each other. We went skating together, played badminton a couple of times. I actually found him a nice guy (except for his habit of getting into personals and asking too many questions).
After G.’s birthday, I started maintaining a distance from her. They had just gotten into a relationship and I did not want to create troubles. I would rarely text her. I would not start conversation online by myself. I would not ask her to go biking or wall-climbing etc. And fortunately, I just met her once on the bus in these months. Earlier, we would occasionally bump into each other while commuting to the university.
So...two nights ago, in Tim Hortons...it was... just what I thought! And it hurts me now. And it hurt me after I started keeping my distance. Because we were/are friends and even then we had/have to keep this stupid distance. Matlab awaien! And I don’t blame G. And I don’t blame M. It’s all natural I guess. People tend to get jealous and uneasy in such situations. And not everybody is as good as I am. :p
Last night G. told me she went shopping because she had to buy a gift for her sister. And without thinking for a moment I typed “Hey remember! Last year we both went to the mall to buy the gift for your sister?” I should not have said that. But I have a feeling she mentioned it deliberately. She misses those times. I know. Not just because while coming back home from Tim, when we were still discussing M. and her, she said she would not want to stop being friends with me or stop meeting me.
To be continued..